I walked.  I walked slowly and let the cold air in.  I walked without a place to be or an agenda to fulfill. I walked until my hands turned red and my body went numb. 

I returned to what little heat this building has to offer and in the transition found myself shivering.

I stood in the shower and let the hot water hit me.  Gradually I increased the temperature.  More, little by little.  I let it hit me until my chest turned red and my body went numb.

Sitting here now, the heat is quickly leaving and soon I'll be shivering.


The problem with having your head in the clouds is that you mistake them for something solid and can't imagine falling through.  The air is thinner up there.  Makes you dizzy.  It's easy to forget the hard truth is still waiting below and soon you'll be heading straight for it.

Soon I'll be laying in bed.  I'll fall asleep and dream.  I'll poke my head in the clouds and play for a while.  I'll do my best to forget the hard ground waiting below.


Love,

Emo

Halloween, I dream of you.

My favorite holiday.

What you are looking at is Sumo wrestling in it's rawest form.  Before the rice, before the ring, before the fans.  A circle in the sand and two guys trying to get each other out of that circle wearing nothing but undergarments.  Try not to soak it all up at once. 

A Day in the Life

When I started organizing this project I had my own life in mind.  How arrogant.  Now that I've started filming it, I've decided that isn't what I want.  Instead, I'm going to film two different lives.  Same guy, same place, two different outlooks on life. 

Presentation:

Both will be shot filming the guy from a by-stander point of view.  It isn't about WHAT he's doing.  It's about HOW he reacts to what he's doing.  By the way, the actor isn't very good.  Try not to be distracted.  Now, do I present them side by side or separately? 

LEMME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!

Photo, Face, Year

I've seen this a couple times and have always wanted to do it, but just never have.  I don't know why I waited.  I'm done waiting.

Starting today I'm going to take a photo of myself for a year.  Same location (until I move), same lighting.  On the one year anniversary I'm going to piece it all together.  If I still enjoy it, I'll continue every year.

This is Steven.  He is what you think he is. 
He likes drinking beer while watching Japanese anime.
He plays online games. 
He's a 27 year old smoker. 
He's a computer programmer. 
He's my friend.

To be or not to be?

Sure, he may have been talking about whether to live or die, but I think there's more truth here than that.  What does it mean "to be or not to be"?  To exist?  Who's to say you exist at all?  YOU?  If there is any answer, that must be the only one.  I have no way of knowing you really exist at all so how can you?  How can you prove it?

Perception is reality.

You can tell me to touch you, but I cannot feel.
You can tell me to see you, but I cannot see.
You can tell me to okay... you get where I'm going with this.

Point is, if we lack our sense, we lack perception.

You're crazy.  You're strapped to a bed.  Your eyes are staring vacantly at the ceiling.  You don't blink.  Behind those eyes though... Behind them you're thinking.  In your head you're reading this post on the internet.  Me sharing this with you is your brain trying to make sense of the situation.  No?  You sure?  What if I'm the one in the bed you ask?  You're right.  I am.  We all are.

Who's to say you exist at all?  You.  Only you.  Question now is, how do you exist?

Why?

Who? What? Where? When? How? ....and WHY?
Of all the questions I like "why?" the most.  Mostly because it's a problem solver.  Sure, the others have a place too, but "why?" is the bad mamba jamba. 

It can go with any problem until eventually there is a solution.  Try it.  Present your problem to the question "WHY?"

This is the scene I view everyday as I walk out of my "home".  Looking at this photo and reading the first sentence, you can begin to piece together a story.  I'm sure it's more questions than anything.  That's okay.  I have them too.  Where was this taken?  What time is it?  Who else lives there?  Do you really need two grills?  I'm not going to tell you.